Cancer is everywhere. A day or two that will go by where I don't think about it, but it rears it's head almost everywhere I look.
For example: (spoiler alert to Downton Abbey fans)
I'm a Downton Abbey fan. I think the only people who aren't fans are those who haven't watched it yet. Even my husband volunteered to watch it with me, and he doesn't watch ANY of my shows! But, as I was saying... in Season 3's opening episode, one of the characters, a servant, feels a lump in her breast and heads to a doctor for testing. She and her friend are concerned that it's cancer. The doctor won't know for sure until he sends the samples out for testing, so we the fans get to wait a week to discover if she does or doesn't.
Seemingly innocent, right? WRONG. Even though I know this is a fictional tale, I could feel this character's agony, the pain of not knowing. It brought back the memories of first feeling my tumor and trying to live life as if it didn't exist. It was awful. And this week on the 2nd episode, when they revealed that the tumor was benign, I breathed a sigh of relief. I was THRILLED that the cancer plot would be dropped and I wouldn't be reminded of the disease every time I watched the show. In fact, I even considered NOT watching the show, just to avoid the memories it gave me... but just for a moment. ;)
Just yesterday I looked through a local newspaper scanning for things to do. What did I see? An article on a breast cancer walk. I was even acquainted with a person who helped organize it! And that got me thinking, "Why did they do a breast cancer walk? January is thyroid cancer awareness month, not breast cancer." And that set off a long train of thought on how I bet no one even knows it's thyroid cancer awareness month and what should I be doing? and blah blah blah...
Then today I see my endocrinologist. He looks all the paperwork over, tells me I have, "the most beautiful scar I've ever seen;" tells me that I was well taken care of by my surgeon, and schedules a body scan to determine if I'll need radioactive iodine (chances are quite good that I will.)
I take a look at this timeline and it doesn't start till February 12th. I have to stop my artificial thyroid hormone medication (meaning I'll be incredibly tired, cold, and gain weight just by looking at food.) I then start a special, low iodine diet (goodbye dairy and everything that comes in a box, can, or jar.) Then I get a blood test, then I see my doctor again, then I get a body scan, and if that scan shows what we think it will show then I get to be radioactive for a while. FUN FUN.
I knew this was coming, but I was hoping it would happen sooner. At this point, the iodine therapy (where I have to be isolated for 2 weeks) won't start until the end of Feb or early March. This means no scrapbook retreat, no celebrating Chris's birthday with him, and no Regional Festival of Life (youth event in Boston.) I am completely and totally bummed. So much, in fact, that I'm trying to get it all moved up. I can't push it back because my best childcare option (Chris's mom) isn't available in March. That, and I don't like the idea of cancer floating around in my body, especially with my sub-type.
So there it is. Cancer, cancer, and more cancer. At least I have good looking scars. ;)